My First Marathon

Sundown Marathon 2012 | Saturday 26 May – Sunday 27 May 2012

The longest I’ve ever ran in my life is about 27-30km, in build-ups towards this race. There’s always this contradictory feeling about races in me – let’s just call it the four phases of self denial:

1. Before race: Argh shit. It’s finally here. All the crap again.
2. At race venue: Oh yeah let’s go for this.
3. During race: Why am I going through this pain? This will be my last.
4. Two hours after race: When’s the next major event?

And the same happened for this race. There’s a number (of groups) of close friends running: Ben/Jianan/Rama, Yong Siang/Sheng Rong/Tai Soon, Qijian. Never got to meet any of them before the race to warm up and start together so it was very much a battle on my own.

So I waited for the whole huge crowd to pass before entering the race lane and commencing my run, which was about half an hour after gun time. The first one third of the run was very much overtaking, and a large part of that was done on cross-country terrain (for the fact that the overtaking was done on grass, pavement, rocks, unfinished roads, kerbs and the roads itself). Finished the first 1/3 within 1:10. Didn’t hydrate for very much of the first third until about 12km.

My original plan was to hydrate next at 25km. Then the route became tough. After passing the barrage at 15km with a timing of 1:16, the apparent 6km was hell. Breath didn’t really go out but the aching was taking its toll. Gave up and took a 100plus at 18km. Managed to scrap through 21km at 1:54 and then, behold the long, straight, seemingly endless path. Touched the U-turn point (25km) at around 2:18 and grabbed a gel. To me, it gave more of a mental rather than physical boost. Cramps still set in and the crazy hydration began (so much for hydration discipline).

The gusts raged and the winds roared. Then the rain came. This rain would surely be the epitome of this year’s Sundown, I guess. As much as it was drenching my shoes, it was cooling me down too, mitigating the need for me to remove my shirt (which I think I would have done if not for the rain). But while the breezes were abundant, this segment surely wasn’t a breeze for me. My speed slowed down very much for my heavy shoes and cramps on both thighs, knees and calves. I started to deduct current timing from target, and calculating the per-km time I needed to hit 4:30. It they ranged between 6-min kilometres and 9-min kilometres all the way up to 36km.

The notion of walking set in. “If I have 10 minutes to spare at this speed, maybe I should walk for 1km” was constantly on my mind. But the evil of giving up never won. Well, maybe in life, evil never wins. So I kept telling myself, if I can hit 30km, push the limit to 33km, and if I hit, 33km, push it to 35km, and so on. And surprisingly after 30km there wasn’t a single thought of stopping.

I hit 30km at about 2:53 (I think I missed the sign). That was when I really started contemplating my remaining time and speeds to keep. I even devised a worst-case scenario. Then came the end of ECP at 34km. The last 8km, which did not have a clear distance as it seemed, was one of the longest 8km in my life. The path down seemed fine but that last 8km was bad. Fatigue really kicked in and I was afraid I couldn’t meet my timing. I screwed my hydration discipline and took 2-3 drinks per hydration point. It was only until the last 5km I decided to stop hydrating and focus on finishing it well. 3:45 at 37km, and I knew I was right on track . The last 5km was painful, but not hard to endure at all.

I hereby have one confession to make. I’m a person full of my own pride, and to prove myself to others, and to always be better than others, I felt that need to push myself on. Truth be told, it was my pride and competitiveness inside me that allowed me to finish the race. Without challenges, without glory at stake, without others to feel superior over, I’m now doubting if I could have even finished that 42km.

In numbers – timings
10km – 0:52 | 15km – 1:16 | 21km – 1:54 | 25km – 2:19 | 28km – 2:38 | 33km – 3:10 | 37km – 3:45 | 42km – 4:21 | Target timing – 4:30 | Average rate: About 6min15sec per km

In figures – hydration
12km, 18km, 21km, 25km, 27km, 30km, 32km, 33km, 35km, 37km

In me forever – lessons learnt
1. You just keep pushing yourself on. It’s about constantly pushing your limit up and raising the bar for yourself. Without that, you could never go further and complete more.
2. Pain is temporary, glory is permanent. 4 hours of pain would pay off well.
3. No matter the pain, you have to endure, for this was the path you chose.

Latest Tumblr obsessions

1. maddieonthings
A photo journal of a dog in all sorts of built landscapes, human based situations and places – be it in cities, rural streets, gardens, in the house. All in all, superb background selection with pretty looking dog.

2. fer1972
General art, unclassified. Contains almost all sorts of 2D visual art  and also chronicles the increasingly popular 3D street art. Sometimes satirical, sometimes thought-invoking, sometimes funny, but usually elegant.

3. theclassyissue
Some explicit content (~30%) aside, good percentage of girls depicted in their best form of grace for visual archive. A good fraction of other stylish, upmarket lifestyle ideas as well.

4. theanimalblog
My dashboard’s National Geographic. Lots of close-up shots of animals in their most natural manner, with a mix of shots depicting emotions and interactions as well. Writeups accompanying photos are informative too.

Local Tourist (Part 1 of 4)

12-15 May: Bangkok Trip | Day 1: Saturday 12 May 2012

Implicitly, this trip was one of some firsts. It was essentially the first time I went overseas with only friends, and the first time I stayed in an overseas local residence. The packing for me the night before dragged till 2am, and while the flight was at 9.40am and we were to meet at 7am. And not to anyone’s surprise, I was late as usual.

And so we checked-in, had breakfast in the gate area and then boarded the plane. Well, it seems that it can’t be helped that feelings would be raked elsewhere. But we just let them be,for what would be, would be. Arrived in Bangkok around noon and the six of us had to wait for Pun for an hour, unable to get him through both landline and mobile. Oh, that’s just so Pun. Yes, names in my dictionary, double-up as adjectives.

We tried, by all means, be it handphone, public phone, and finally decided to narrow down our search area. Well, CC seems to have a penchant for being late for meeting timings. Resolution: cab home from the airport.

I must say my first impression of Bangkok isn’t a decent one. First, the airport arrival hall is in a mess with unclear signage and complicated weaving of barriers and escalators. That didn’t really matter, while nothing else shocked me – the surrounding of the airport was representative of a typical Asian middle-income country, and so the transport culture.

Pun’s house was impressive. Almost unprecedented by any within our affordability range in Singapore, about 4000 sqft of land area, garage fit for two or three cars, and a three-storey house with five or six bedrooms and ample of space, nice furnishing and amenities. Then we promptly settled down, met his mum who was really kind and gracious, and then changed up and left for Bangkok’s shopping district.

We walked around the area and managed to get a glimpse of the four-faced Buddha and a tour of Bangkok’s most exquisite mall. We then moved on for some real shopping at this mall called Platinum. To me, it was very much alike many of the centralised wholesale markets in China or Malaysia where there were small stores not exceeding 3m x 8m, just that they grouped the stores in categories and the whole place was much much larger than anywhere else I’ve seen. The prices of the goods were the incentive to Bangkok itself. This triggered the hormone in me and I started to splurge, and so did the guys too.

Just to illustrate the point, and justify my craze, average prices are as follows:

• Printed tees: 150-180 baht ($6-$7)
• Shirts: 290-350 baht ($12-$15)
• Pants: 400-600 baht ($16-$24)
• Shoes: 790-990 baht ($32-$40)

Had dinner at a nice local restaurant serving rather good seafood and most importantly, once again, cheap seafood. The epic highlight – one fresh oyster the size of half a palm going for 45 baht (around $2). I couldn’t help but relate the large difference in standard of living between Thailand and Singapore. Yes, it’s not the first time I’ve seen such a gap, but each time I feel it, I can’t help but appreciate our unrivalled growth rates resulting in the super-high standards of living we frequently complain of.

Before I forget, the best food I could ever have in Thailand was before the dinner – fried grasshopper. It isn’t the best because of its taste (which was like any normal fried stuff with seasoning), but because of the radical notion of eating insects – something I’ve always wanted to try. I vowed to move on to other higher-level insects but it did not materialise.

Oh and before the grasshopper was a game of darts which we all took turns to throw (there were perfectly seven darts per try). Pun, being the usual competitive and victory-hungry him, bought one more try and we all tried again. But the main point was the anxiety among us was spreading to the whole of downtown Bangkok with 7x well-trained 140dB voices.

The original plan after dinner was the famous/notorious (you decide) ping-pong show which we never got to watch due to fatigue. To summate the first day, we went to a nearby Tesco with seven on a car (epic!) to get some supplies, not forgetting the 25 baht ($1) per bottle beer! The car ride to and back was totally fun and epic. Whichever the case, we just went home, showered, lazed around and went to sleep.

Alright, that concludes Day 1 if I didn’t miss anything out. Truth be told, I’m starting to hate writing in reportive style like such. I don’t know why, I used to love it in secondary school. Okay, maybe reporting is okay but surely not narratve. Well, but to chronicle one of the best overseas trips I had, I shall do so. The next post will encompass happenings and thoughts for Day 2.

High and Low

High: USMS approved, fruitful cohesion
Low: Rejected by SMU Law

Maroon 5 – Payphone

Video

It’s seriously stuck in my head OMGOMGOMG

Why I am me and you are you.

I have, of late, been rather obsessed with a quote (credits to Alfred):

“No one opts for mediocrity/normality but many settle for it. Never settle.”

I think this is rather true. And it is very much what explains my rather eccentric actions I am doing to my university path while still serving NS.

Most NSFs would never bother or worry about their university placing after securing a place at the first possible opportunity. Much less scholarships, and needless to say fill themselves with knowledge in a move to sharpen the edge. But on the contrary, I engage in all three of the above. Many consider that odd. Why bother? Why change course? Why apply for scholarships and get bonded/stressed? Why waste time ‘studying’ while you should be relaxing?

Well, I shall explain them one by one.

1. I have been trained to try to get the best possible result in every attempt at anything and everything. But in the past 19 years of my life I have frequently been slacking off and I decided to wake up, after given a blow by and Army recruitment officer who said, “No, with your results, you can only secure a third-tier SAF scholarship.” But my original principle doesn’t change. When there’s a chance to get something better, I will try. Anyway, no harm trying. So what if the school rejects you? So what if the school calls you up for an interview and you screw it up? It doesn’t matter at all. At least, to me.

2. Scholarships are a taboo for some. To them, it just entails a dreadful bond period and over-stressed four years of university which they do not get to enjoy. But please, I encourage you to look beyond these. A scholarship actually gives you an insight to the industry and headstart to your career. Forget about the money, there highly tangible. These are intangible stuff you would never get. And the stress? They’re non-existent. Well, if you’re afraid of bond and study stress, and can never overcome that phobia, then you’re not suited for a scholarship anyway.

3. Life is about continuing to keep your mind and body sharp and fit. You do not slack off just because the nation gives you two years to do so. Some spend this time wisely, and I’m glad they did. Their brains are kept awake. To me, life is alive only if the brain is engaged. Otherwise, there’s no point living. What’s the point if you have a brain, the hallmark of human intellect, and you don’t use it? I think this quote commonly used in the Navy is really true and applicable to life as well: “Ships in harbour are safe, but that’s not what ships are made for.”

Maybe all these are just me. I’ve been raised in such a way such that I’m ultra-competitve (but not protective) and I never settle. Probably due to teachings, but more of environments I guess. I’m rather petrified at the fact that many people have very, very mediocre or even below average career dreams. “I just want to relax.”, “I want a simple life.” Nonsense. What’s life if you just live it simple and you don’t give it your all?

What’s life if you just live it simple and you don’t give it your all?

P.S. I have only one source of stress: people who complain about stress. What is stress in the first place? Just self-inflicted torture.

Nationalism

Amdist all the furore over the Ferrari-taxi crash causing three deaths, I shall weigh in as well. To me, like many others, the incident was a display of netizens’ and citizens’ nationalistic behaviour rather than moral values. All the arrows were pointed to the Ferrari driver, a Chinese expatriate, whose irresponsible behaviour was the cause of the accident. And while xenophobia grew, many prominent netizens have posted notes and write-ups all over the Internet urging people to stop their narrow-minded thinking and be more objective. There are also calls for the government to correct this seemingly flawed mindset.

While I do agree with this, let’s put this issue in another perspective – nationalism. Has anyone noticed that anti-foreigner sentiments are actually a show of a gradual build-up in patriotism? While one might argue patriotism is about accepting all residents, regardless of nationality, in our country and into the society as one people. But the issue of implicit divided loyalties kick in. Anyone remembers Sun Xu, the Chinese scholar who has been in Singapore for a period of time but still has strong anti-Singaporean sentiments which he could not contain? Or is anyone irritated by foreign labourers living in your estate and more often than not making a mess which they do not realise? The influx of foreign be-it-talent-or-not has actually driven up our loyalty to Singapore, something which has been missing in the 1990s I suppose. But patriotism, for all it has been given that boost, presents us with another situation, making itself seem skewed and instead of unifying the nation, it is doing the opposite.

The country is now essentially divided. The two groups of people have different sets of habits and values and they are obviously misaligned. The job of the government now seems clear – to make sure one group barges. And they must be the foreigners. More often than not, they refuse to. Yet, as tempted as the government are to evict them, we need them. For both brawn and brains.

But in this specific case of the road accident, I have to concur with my countrymen that we have been focusing on the wrong argument. We have overlooked the basis of reckless driving – morals, not nationality. Why have the forum replies drifted? Is it just because the one at fault was a foreginer? If that is so, we are just displaying xenophobic nationalism. True nationalism is criticising the morals of the driver, regardless of his nationality.

If it was a Singaporean driving the Ferrari, how different would this case go?

Global Citizen

Leaving for Thailand in about 8 hours’ time. Not that I love travelling, but I do find it a pleasure, especially with the right people.

Regarding people, we all ought to be open minded and no matter what we’re put in, take it in stride, yes/no?

In the larger picture, we all need to learn to be global citizens in an age when the Earth is shrinking just like ladies’ clothes. Soon, travelling must become part of a lifestyle and exposure to different cultures is compulsory.

Things to do before (my youth’s) death

https://youtakecontrol.wordpress.com/one-life

True to self

The past two weeks haven’t been very fruitful for me. I simply wasted my time doing unproductive nonsense or just lazing around. To some, that may be acceptable. But to me, it just isn’t. I just feel that that isn’t the way to go, I ought to spend life doing things more achieving of my own ability.

But, one doesn’t have to worry to much. What matters most is that one is happy. So long I’m happy doing something I ought not to think too much. But then again, there are more things to achieve. If you want what you want, you have to do what you don’t want.

~

I just had numerous conversations with different people around me on various topics, and I found that I’ve been rather misaligned on certain issues. We all have a certain set of values we hold true to ourselves. But that does not give one the right to enforce his own philosophy over another. I’m just rather upset that there are people who I live and work with love to use force and a perceived level of superiority to make people around them comply with their ways of life. To me, these people are just living in their own well, and fail to recognise that people are made to be different, and more importantly, fail to accept that fact and accept others.

Well, I believe that is one thing I really cannot tolerate. I feel, and know, that I do have a very high tolerance level for many things. In other words, I’m hyper-competent at the art of sucking thumb. But when I meet with issues I cannot stand, my temper would give in. And I guess I would soon.

Many would tell me I don’t have to think too much. But the way I see it, not being true to self is one blunder in life. One of the things I hold true would be this – to be true to myself, and the values and philosophy I believe in.

~

On a lighter note, I read this article on the web: http://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/what-singapore-can-teach-us/2012/05/02/gIQAlQEGwT_story.html

And I’m rather proud that Singapore have been featured on a major platform. I’ve always thought that Americans are really critical on our system which less and less Singaporeans pride on, and it pleasures me to know that just one American is approving of this system which even Singaporeans ourselves are ungrateful and unappreciative.

Say, for example, our HDB and MRT are the envy of Westerners, the supposed “first world”. Yet Singaporeans show no sense of gratitude, and complaints are all they see. Is it because in our blind chase for progress, we have neglected the very basics of being thankful for what we have? Have we forgot our past, and the struggles our forefathers went through to ensure our impeccable standards of living today?

So Singaporeans, please.